Becoming Whole Again*



            These three processes all divide our experience in different ways, fragmenting   us into warring parts and interfering with our full enjoyment of living.  Grief separates us unnecessarily from the rich and resourceful feelings that we have had with someone we loved, but who is now lost to us. Grief also divides us internally, between a part that is preoccupied with the feeling of emptiness in response to the loss and the fear of being hurt again, and another part that wants to reconnect with others and reenter the land of the living.
            Judgement transforms a rich and complex experience of liking or disliking something into an oversimplified and information-poor evaluation of good or bad. This sets our feet on a path that results in great difficulties both for ourselves and those around us. Faced with an either/or forced choice between good and evil, I have to struggle to eliminate the bad in myself as well as in the world. My judgement traps both myself and others in a process that begins with separation and rejection, and often ends in violence and killing.
            Anger separates us from those who harmed us, in order to protect us. But it also divides us internally. One part of us is preoccupied with resentment and thoughts of revenge to protect us from further harm. Another part would like to be free of this preoccupation and return to enjoying life.
            All these processes fragment us, and make it impossible to experience the wholeness and connection with others and our surroundings that is at least one aspect of spiritual experience and a spiritual life.
            This workshop will teach you very systematic patterns developed by Steve and Connirae Andreas to heal these conflicts and become whole again.

You will learn how to:
            Transform grief in response to a loss into a resourceful and joyful reconnection with the feeling of presence of the lost person by:

      —Knowing when the person needs to make a shift in the content of their experience of loss.
      —Identifying the unique submodality differences between the loss experience and an opposite experience of presence and fullness.
      —Using the submodality differences to change the dissociated loss into a resourceful associated experience of presence and fullness.
      —Taking this experience of fullness into the future, so that it draws you to reconnect with people in your life and establish new relationships.
      —Using the same pattern for the loss of a dream, and for lost things, activities, information and locations.

            Transform an absolute and universal experience of judgement of good/bad into a rich personal experience of preference by:

      —Identifying and reconnecting with the elements of experience that are deleted in a judgement.
      —Giving up the coercion in judgement that disconnects you from both yourself and others.
      —Regaining compassion for both yourself and others, and reconnecting with them.
      —Recovering the personal power to choose and influence others, that was lost in the absolute judgement.

            Transform anger into a congruent and compassionate forgiveness that supports doing whatever is necessary to protect you from repetition of the harm that was done to you by:

      —Learning how to satisfy the objections that prevent someone from even considering forgiveness as a solution.
      —Identifying the limiting presuppositions that permit and support anger.
      —Identifying the unique submodality differences between an experience of anger and one of forgiveness.
      —Accessing or teaching effective means of protection from future harm that is necessary to fully embracing forgiveness.
      —Transforming anger into forgiveness by using the submodality differences between them.

Related Links:
Resolving Grief

Forgiveness article

The Forgiveness Pattern

Diffusing Reflexive Anger
 Live client video demonstration of the Forgiveness process, with introduction and follow-up commentary on the session)